Tuesday, April 5, 2011

If I Could ...

When I was little I was always frustrated by those stories in which someone received three wishes. It seemed that the person often squandered the wishes, even in search of a good moral to the story.

I was sure I would know how to spend those wishes if given the opportunity!

But I look back at the 5 year old, 9 year old, 13, 20 and 30 year old and realize that the wishes I would have had at each of those ages would look like squandering to my next age of development.

As I've grown up, the conventional wishes (more money, more stuff, more, more more) have paled as my maturity has dictated that more doesn't equal better.

It is true that as a mom, there are times I would have wished for my children to not have to struggle in one area or another, but I have come to understand it is the struggle that builds their character.

There are times I would have wished for more happiness and fewer mean people in the world, but I realize that happiness can only be fulfilled by a personal quest for Truth ... and mean people are just those who don't know Jesus yet.

And there are times I would wish for my personal relationships with others to be more Christ-like and less selfish. But if my marriage, children, and interactions with others were seamless and trouble free, would I ever be seeking God's presence?

So, I've come to the point where I don't waste a lot of time and energy wishing for things to be different than they are.  If I can change them, and care enough to do so, it is incumbent upon me to follow that course. If I can't change them, or it's not a big enough issue for me to expend that effort, I can let it go.

But this morning, I truly feel like I have a worthy wish to make.  I wish I could bring back my dear friend who died nearly four years ago.  He was a husband, father, Christian and all around great guy. He had that rare ability of listening to you as if you were the only important person in the room. He treated his family that way too, and they all just glowed with that love. But his time on this earth was finished, and he rests in the arms of the Lord now.

But ... his baby, his daughter, is getting ready to graduate from college, and is mourning her dad. Every milestone in her life will be shadowed by the sadness that he isn't there to share it with her.

Given the circumstances, none of us can or should take that pain from her.

But boy, don't I wish I could make it so the pain would never have had to occur at all.

Love you, KT.

4 comments:

The Bug said...

That is a worthy wish. I feel the same way about my mom - all the things she's missing since she isn't here. At least her children were adults when she died. I'll say a prayer for your friend's daughter.

Larry said...

wow that is deep

quilly said...

My grandmother died in 1978, and there is still so much I wish I could share with her. I know exactly how your young friend feels. My prayers are with her.

Robin said...

My 35 year old cousin called me in the middle of (his) night last night. It was his birthday, and he was mourning the fact that his mother was no longer there to share it with him. I'd have given anything to bring her back. I miss her terribly, and she was only my aunt, I can't even imagine the depth of the loss he feels.